The Millions

My relationship with John Banville is a strange and unnatural one. In some odd sense I can’t quite identify, I often think that it might even be an unseemly one. A few months back, I finished a Ph.D., having written my thesis on Banville’s fiction. It took me about four years to complete, which means that over that period—at a rough calculation along the lines of a 42 hour working week and a 50 week working year—I spent something in the region of 8,400 hours engaged in activities that were directly Banville-related. 8,400 hours: that’s basically the equivalent of an entire calendar year spent reading his novels, thinking about them, reading and thinking about other academics’ opinions of them, formulating my own opinions, and thinking of clever things to write based on them. There’s nothing remarkable, of course, about a person spending a non-trivial portion of his or her life writing a doctoral thesis about the work of a single writer (university English departments are full of such misfits) but it is presumably fairly unusual for a person to spend four years writing a doctoral thesis on the work of someone who is not only still living and writing, but doing so within a couple of minutes’ walk from where that thesis is being written.

Dublin is a fairly small city. While I was working on my thesis in Trinity College, it wasn’t unusual for me to leave the library to go for a sandwich somewhere and to pass Banville on the street. It happened more than once that I would be having lunch and he would enter the restaurant and sit down a couple of tables away, or walk past the window with his fedora, his large and quaintly flamboyant scarf, and his mysterious canvas carrier bag.

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The Millions

“All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.”—Blaise Pascal

“What’s the point in going out? We’re just going to wind up back here anyway.”—Homer Simpson

The novel is perhaps the most housebound of all art forms. At both ends of its supply chain, there is a fairly strong imperative to stay put. There have always been writers who practice their profession in unusual locations, of course, just as a certain amount of reading is always going to be done on the move—on buses, on trains, on planes. But the literary exchange is, for the most part, a sedentary one. Writers tend to hold up their end of the deal by sitting at a desk and staying there until the book is written; readers tend to hold up theirs by sitting still, book in hand, until it is read. “The novel,” as Martin Amis once observed, “is all about not going out of the house.”

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The Millions 

I used to be the kind of reader who gives short shrift to long novels. I used to take a wan pleasure in telling friends who had returned from a tour of duty with War and Peace orThe Man Without Qualities with that I’ve-seen-some-things look in their eyes—the thousand-page stare—that they had been wasting their time. In the months it had taken them to plough through one book by some logorrheic modernist or world-encircling Russian, I had read a good eight to ten volumes of svelter dimensions. While they were bench-pressing, say, Infinite Jest for four months solid, I had squared away most of the majorNouveau Romanciers, a fistful of Thomas Bernhards, every goddamned novel Albert Camus ever wrote, and still had time to read some stuff I actually enjoyed.

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The Sunday Business Post

Adultery has always provided novelists with a fertile thematic soil, rich in tragic and sometimes comic possibilities. Emma Bovary, Anna Karenina and Edna Pontellier (the heroine of Kate Chopin’s The Awakening) are memorable and powerful characters, not just because they are such vivid creations, but also because the stakes of their choices are so high.They all come to a similar end because their passions are, in the contexts of their times, essentially tragic. Read the rest of this entry »

The Sunday Business Post


Kevin Barry’s debut novel comes festooned with dust-jacket commendations from marquee name authors. ‘‘The most arresting and original writer to emerge from these islands in years,” claims Irvine Welsh on the front cover. Meanwhile, round the back, Joseph O’Connor abandons all restraint with regard to this ‘‘unforgettably wonderful novel’’, which he pitches to the prospective reader as ‘‘Joyce meets Anthony Burgess’’, and as ‘‘an electrifying masterpiece . . . as funny as Flann O’Brien’’. Read the rest of this entry »

Mongrel Magazine

In the aftermath of the tragic death of Old Dirty Bastard and the even more tragic Tim Allenification of Method Man, Ghostface Killah (aka Tony Starks, aka Iron Man) has been left carrying the Wu Tang flame. Always one of the more exciting talents of the group’ s nine core members, Ghostface’ s unique and extraordinary style – intense, shamelessly emotive, effortlessly surreal and yet undeniably gritty – has made him the rapper almost every other rapper wants to be, if only they would admit it to themselves. He has an oddly Manichaean, almost medieval view of life and morality and he’ s also, in his own peculiar way, a pretty nice guy. Listen to the man, now: he’ s got some things to say that need saying. Read the rest of this entry »

Mongrel Magazine

It’s just after noon on Bloomsday, and Christopher Hitchens – author, Vanity Fair columnist, professional contrarian and ridiculously high-functioning alcoholic – is making preparations to begin his day’s drinking. He opens the hotel room mini bar, glowering contemptuously into its interior, before deciding there’s nothing in it to meet his exacting requirements. He hands me a quarter bottle of white wine and rings down to reception. His urbane boozehound’s speaking voice is as suavely self-possessed as his prose. Read the rest of this entry »

Mongrel Magazine

Photo by Nick Hamilton

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It is 5.30am, just after dawn, and already it is hellishly hot in Phoenix, Arizona. At Estrella jail, the world’s only women’s chain gang is preparing to move out. Marching on the spot, black leather boots thudding heavily on the polished floor and their chains rippling and clinking, they begin their chant. Read the rest of this entry »

Mongrel Magazine

1.

There is a dark island of blood, about three foot long and maybe one third as wide, in the centre of the dull brown carpet, presumably marking the point where the head hit the ground. For a gunshot suicide, it seems to lack a certain gruesomeness that we have been led to expect from violent deaths. Otherwise the room is more or less unremarkable. A few dumbells lying around the floor, evidence of the former tenant’s less effective method of taking aggression out on himself. I don’t want to admit to being disappointed, but I expected more of a spectacle, visually speaking.

Not that the scene isn’t bizarre and macarbre in its own way: standing over the patch of blood is Shawn Clarke, prized employee of Crime Scene Cleaners, Inc. and self-professed ‘Extreme Janitor’, arguing as politely as he can over the price of the clean-up job with the brother and the father of the young man whose remains have soaked into the carpet. Read the rest of this entry »

The Guardian Books Blog

The impression we get of Socrates from the writings of Plato, Aristotle and Xenophon is that of a man who spent a great deal of time sitting around markets and harbours, chewing the philosophical fat with his fellow Athenians. He would establish himself on the steps of the Parthenon (or wherever else was convenient) and start throwing out provocative questions about the nature of virtue or the ideal form of government.

Anyone who happened to be passing by – from the lowliest fisherman to the most eminent arms dealer – could hitch up their toga and hunker down for a bit of ratiocination with ancient Greece’s most important thinker. It is probably no coincidence that the world’s first democracy had such an equal-opportunities approach to its favourite intellectual pastime (unless, that is, you happened to be a woman or a slave, but let’s not quibble over a demographic that only accounted for two thirds of the Athenian population). Read the rest of this entry »

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